I often listen to moms (or read about them) who say they wish they weren’t so busy. These mothers are often so exhausted from working outside the home (or inside the home) they feel the life force drained from them every waking minute. When precious sleep finally comes, it’s interrupted by insomnia or cries of tiny babies. These mothers wish they weren’t so busy. If only they had more time for their children.
I hear you, dear Momma! I’ve been there many, many, times. I was once the mother who worked 40+ plus hours outside the home and left her babies each day, only to come home too exhausted to give them what I thought they needed. I’m here to give you some comfort.
Quality Not Quantity
First of all, let me tell you that it’s quality time that counts with your children. Only you know what this looks like for your family. This may look like sitting down for a meal, reading a short book, or sitting to play for a few moments. Whatever your quality time looks like, keep these things in mind:
- Be Present – Be fully present for those minutes you’re with your children. This will not only make it more meaningful to them, but to you. You’ll feel like you’re spending more time when you give quality.
- Don’t Compare – Don’t pay attention to what another mom is doing with her children. Your time should not look like hers. Your children are different.
- Talk with them – Whether they’re infants or teenagers, take time to talk with your children. Keeping that line of communication open makes you feel connected to your children when you’re away.
Remind yourself each day that it’s better to give a few minutes of quality time then worry over the quantity you’re giving (or not giving).
Little Things Matter
When you’re with your children, make a point to soak in all the little things. Sometimes, I sit on the couch and just watch my children play. This is when I really notice the little things about them. I notice that my daughter jumps higher in her ballet routine than yesterday. I see that my 2-year-old son puts puzzles together better than 2 weeks ago.
This when I make a point to verbally take note of these things. I tell them that I see the improvements they’re making. Sometimes, as mothers, we get caught up in all the things we must “fix” about our children that we neglect to take note of the little things. These are the things that matter and that your children will remember.
Let Grace Abound
Whether you’re working inside the home or outside, I know that finding the balance in life is difficult. This is when you have to just let some things go. Give yourself grace. The dishes and the laundry aren’t going anywhere.
This may require some training on your part especially if you’re not used to letting things go. Remember, you can’t impart grace to your children if you’re not living it yourself.
Regardless of what your life looks like, make a point to embrace the little things and small moments with your children.
-Danielle